Food / Mind / Body

WTF am I doing wrong!?


“You are confined only by the walls you build yourself”

Fear and Self Doubt are battles we all have experience fighting; regardless of  victory or loss there is great value that can be extracted. “WTF am I doing wrong” is a question I often ask myself.. in fact, I just recently had this discussion with my brain last week.

I’ll paint the picture for you:

I am an incredibly hard worker. If I was being honest, I would say I am the hardest working fitness professional in Philadelphia.

DREAM big.  I refuse to think I have limitations and never settle for how things are.

I hold myself (and those around me) to a very high expectation. To say I hate mistakes, that are not learned from, is an understatement.

Now…while I have created my own company, my own brand, my own following, a successful business model, haters, supporters, a profitable location, and I’m working on finalizing a second location… I sat here and started to doubt myself…why?

Because I got scared.

I asked myself, what happens if I bit off more than I can chew?

I said, what happens if I fail to provide for all of my team and clients?

I wondered, did I make a mistake?

I believe FEAR is the fuel that feeds the fire. Not all fear is alike. The fear of not reaching your potential at your current job may create the drive for you to get a promotion with a new company. The fear of failing at business may help you work even harder to not miss the details and try to excel.

However, the fire can sometimes get out of control, the fear sometimes takes over.

Our society tries to convey this message that there is no need to be afraid, there is no value in being scared – BULLSHIT. If someone claims to not be afraid, not have self doubt, it is because they are a liar or have become so complacent with life that they have given up on becoming anything other than ordinary.

I sat and spent countless hours trying to figure out why business felt slow.  Was my new website too much of a change? Did my SEO changes hurt my Google rankings? Did I get too ahead of the market by changing my services? Was my price increase too much? Was traffic to the website lower? Is my CTR on a downward trend?  What was going on!?

Nothing. In fact we did great last week, over $17,000 in 5 days.  So what is the point of this story – what could I have gained from all of these time spent trying to find a problem that did not exist? Wasn’t all of that worrying a mistake?

No, and here is why:

I discovered the reason for my self doubt.  I feel my potential exceeds my current circumstances.  When the delta between my expectations and reality grows too large, I become eager to ”catch up”.

I did my due diligence and now know all of the details and ramifications of the website changes, price changes, new SEO tactics, you name it. Without my self doubt, none of this information would have been discovered.

My fire is still burning. I have not grown complacent with my success nor have I let it make me feel invincible.  This fear of failure, the idea of not being able to provide value to clients and my team, while it got the best of me this time, was a reality check and set the spark under my ass to work relentlessly on my next big project for 2016.

I fully believe that if you are not scared, you are a coward and are doomed to be unhappy. Now this may be harsh and a huge generalization – but I stand by it.

Step out of your comfort zone.  Apply for the job that is ‘out of your leagues’. Ask the guy out that is ‘way too good looking’. Quit the job that you are only at because you ‘need it’.  Start the company that you have ‘no idea how to get started’. Have kids. You name it!

Find your biggest fear, and open the door to experience it. I guarantee the door opens a world of possibilities that you did not know existed. Otherwise, be doomed to the world that you currently know.